Quote black text on yellow background: Thank you for battling and continuing to speak up for Autistic rights. Because it must hurt, day in and day out to see, hear and read that stuff. And you keep at it with strong words, truth, love and the message of acceptance. Amy Bean - Respectfully Connected

Normalised, no thanks.

Recently I had the experience of being kicked out of a Facebook biomedical page.

Because I spoke up when a mother of an autistic child said that people are talking about Autism like its a gift, it’s the new thing, when children with autism actually need to be normalised.
She actually said normalised.
The whole thing made me so angry, it was exhausting.
I know some may think, what else would I expect from such a page?

I know that autistic people are hurt by these things being said. That many avoid these types of pages. That many autistic advocates take up the keyboard to call bullshit on these types of things said. But it’s exhausting. Almost pointless to talk to these types of people.
I was kicked off because I was not there to heal my son. That’s true. I just occasionally like lurk to remind myself that some children are subjected to a myriad of protocols, diets, supplements and therapies because they are autistic.
That some children are constantly monitored, measured, poked, prodded, tested, compared and treated like a guinea pig.
I lurked because I needed reminding that this stuff really happens. Not just happens. This is happening to people. To children. And I don’t want to get to comfortable in my bubble and forget that there are people that need to be challenged.

The parents were angry that I dare point what was said was offensive.
They were more offended by me daring to suggest that what was said hurts autistic children and adults. That autistic advocates have written plenty about being “normalised” and maybe they should listen.
Many times I have heard that autistic people’s voices are often dismissed by parents of autistic children. This has always seen so bizarre to me.

But no it seems they don’t want to listen.
Not on a page where talking about what shots were magic for your child, which special doctor and supplements at hundreds of dollars aren’t making Tommy talk.
It occurred to me that many miracles and amazing developments happening at around the ages of 2 -6yrs. It’s amazing that children so young are having a barrage of different things to ingest and therapy to endure and any progress must be THAT. Couldn’t it possibly be also a naturally part of development for the child?

The thing that has also struck me from this experience is how much I need to thank the autistic advocates.
Thank you. Thank you for battling and continuing to speak up for Autistic rights.
For continually educating me and others on autism and helping to support my son.
Thank you for going up against so many people, entire organisations and doing it with such heart.
Because it must hurt, day in and day out to see, hear and read that stuff. And you keep at it with strong words, truth, love and the message of acceptance.

2 replies
  1. Vicky
    Vicky says:

    First off, can I just say that I love this blog? I'm eagerly devouring the posts! 🙂

    This one resonates with me as well. I'm an Autistic parent of two Autistic kids. Unfortunately, this means I don't really fit in with the other parents of children on the spectrum, both due to my neurology and "unique" perspective on things; i.e. not wanting to cure my kids and not seeing them as a tragedy. And if I let it slip that I'm also on the spectrum, I'm either (a) suddenly avoided by the other mums/dads, or (b) turned into a "token"; no longer a peer but a walking diagnosis. I used to think that maybe I could educate the other parents in that way, but that ends when I say things they don't really want to hear. In short, it's come to the point where I hesitate to attend Autism-related events or socialise with other "autism parents", due to the inevitable rejection. It's either that or keep quiet about who and what I am, but I'm terrible at hiding it.

    I guess this is a roundabout way of saying that I've experienced the same thing you're talking about, in real life. I so appreciate this post.

    Reply

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